Ta Da!
Here you go, boys and girls. What you’ve all been waiting for *drum roll* … a picture of my new sofa bed. I hate calling it a sofa bed except that it’s self-explanatory, I prefer to call it a couch.
And this honking thing is huge with a capital “H”. Ok, so let’s make that Huge.
I didn’t realize how huge it was. Funny, I thought it was about the same size as the leather one, and less wide because it only has a double bed. I was wrong. What could have thrown me off? Would it be the fact that when I bought it I was standing in some big showroom that was 50 feet high and as big as a Costco store? It may just have been the fact that there were a helluva lot bigger couches there. So I guess I thought this one was small.
And when I sit on it… I’m way up there. High. I want to take you higher, boom laka laka laka, boom laka laka. I get to lord it all over all those lower people in the living room. Ha ha, I’m going places.
The arms are nice and comfy – no circulation cut off by a futon tube. All in all I’m pretty damned satisfied. I hope I don’t slop something all over it, or have some burning ember go flying off my cigarette and put a hole in it (yes, yes, yes, alright, I haven’t quit smoking again yet, stop ragging on me – maybe this coming week).
So let me tell you the weird thing at the delivery last night between 7:30 and 8:00. Two black guys were delivering, and it was a good thing they looked pretty muscular, cuz remember, they had to get this up 3 flights of stairs.
Well they finally get it to the top and they can’t get it through the door. It’s kinda stuck in the doorway. So I tell them I will take down the light fixture in the hallway, then they should be able to stand it up completely.
But as I’m talking I see into the stairwell, and isn’t the fucking owner standing on the stairs watching all this. And I think to myself, “WTF is he doing here… I’m not allowed to buy a new couch now?”
So as I get up to take down the light fixture I say, “hey George, did you want something?” and he tells me that he’s just watching everything. So I make some small talk about how I just bought a new couch and it’s really heavy cuz it’s a sofa bed, yada yada yada. He goes away a few minutes later.
But WTF was he doing there? You know what I think? I think he thought that I might have somebody else moving in with me since we were putting in a new couch.
He had a real problem when my son was moving in and had a big truck outside with 3 of his friends to store his furniture in our garage. He started asking me what was going on and I told him that my son was coming to stay for a month or two and he started freaking out on me, saying that first it’s a month, then it’s six months, it can’t be for a month, look at all this furniture, bla bla bla bla bla.
Then I kinda freaked on him and said, “George. I don’t need your permission to let my son stay with me. I pay rent for a 3-bedroom apartment and if I want to let my son stay here, I will, you have nothing to say about it. And it doesn’t matter whether it’s his furniture in the garage or my furniture. I pay for the garage and I’ll put what I want in it.”
So George at that time kinda backed down. Perhaps cuz he knew I was right. But this just killed me last night that he was standing there watching as if it was his business when I buy a new piece of furniture. Fuck I’d love to move. Somewhere with a barbecue and a backyard. Unfortunately there’s no place else where the rent is so cheap.
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Comments
That looks SO much better than the sheeted futon. You could get away with serving actual cocktails in a room with a couch like that – mojitos, martinis, and such…imported beer at the very least. There you go, start an after hours house. That’ll get the landlord going. 
Sounds like George needs to have his nose stuck up his ass instead of other people’s business!
Want me to send the boys round? 
idiotonastick
Minna
Dave Barker
I used Moneris for over two years. I recently terminated due to a merchant compliance requiremen t – Moneris began...
Maria
just another
Female, taken, fire, Sagittarius, Monkey, Toronto, two kids, one grandson, IT.
55
is the new 30. I want the world to close their mouths when they’re eating or chewing gum. If they don’t, I want to elbow them in the face.
Very nice couch. I like it